Journal Entry One, May 11th 2017

As part of my promise I am making my first online journal entry.  It has been a long two weeks.  May has not been easy.  The family I was living with on the reservations went back to their old ways of drinking and smoking all day.  Leaving the kids and my self to fend for our selves.  I naturally take over parenting with kids that are not my own.  However this felt different.

I felt the kids needed a better influence in their lives and yet there wasn’t anything I could do to help.  In fact even just being with the family was enabling the parents to live the life style.  I thought my presence could detour those habits but it is not my place.  It is their place to find their healing.  So, I may love the children.  I felt the best thing to do was to move to Winslow Az, an hour away.

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My favorite kids on the rez!

It was the closest place I could find to park my RV and an hour drive isn’t so bad.  I couldn’t leave right away though as I was waiting on a check from my bank so I could purchase a new vehicle to help me get around the reservation.  I asked for donations but didn’t get a dime.  I took it as a sign to move on and pursue my own financial ends.  It took 4 days of waiting, but I finally got the check.

While I was waiting I checked in on Maxine regularly and took frequent showers at the Shungopavi Administrative office.  Maxine is one of the ladies I look after, she has leukemia and I have been giving her holistic medicines, i.e. apple cider vinegar, dandelion root, and frankincense for head aches.  We were both pretty amazed when the medicines worked.  She is getting better every day!

Well on my way to Winslow I prayed to God for help.  Of course, he sends two angels to help out.  They are Jessy and Phillip, a very sweet couple who lives at the RV park with me.  They raise 4 kids together in a fairly large RV.  All boys, a dog, and a snake.  They just so happened to be going to Phoenix to buy a car as well.  I swear every time I pray God sends me two people to help.

So I spent last Friday with my new friends and their son Ethan. Niko (my dog) of course came along.  It turned out to be the hottest day of the year with temps at 108 degrees.  Poor Niko couldn’t even walk on the sidewalks it was so hot.  I had to carry him everywhere.  Of course the one dealership we decide to buy at, has no water!

Hot and getting hotter, we finally decide on one of two cars.  At that exact moment the dealer says he has to leave and we have to finish everything the next day.  Having been lucky enough to get a ride and not wanting to repeat my night in Paris.  I said there was no way I could wait that long.  It had to be done today.

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Niko resting by the window to stay cool.

I felt guided by my angels to pursue this deal to the end, even if it killed me.  Well it almost killed Niko.  Long story short, the devil tried to stop us from getting this van at every corner.  Yet I just knew in my heart to get this van.  Meanwhile Niko and I are both exhausted tired and hot.  Mostly thirsty. While waiting at the owner of the dealership brought Niko a cup of ice water.  It looked amazing because he handed me a soda.  I don’t drink soda.

Not to be ungrateful but I just couldn’t drink sugary syrup while being that hot.  It would have made my throat stick together. After driving to two different DMV title places, we finally finished the deal at 8:30pm.  I left the dealership feeling tired and glad to be over with it.  I didn’t even care that the van had no gas.

Once on the highway with the air conditioner blowing a warning goes off.  Low Oil Pressure!  Red lights and beepy noises.  This was turning out to be bad.  Do I sleep in the van and get it checked out or fix it on my own.  I called my new friend Phillip, he said check the oil a couple times and bring it home.  I added a quart of oil after checking the dip stick at off ramp.  It was dark and I swear it looked low.

I drove on, light came back on again. I pulled over at a gas station and checked it out.  It looked low again.  Added a second court.  This time I said screw it, if the motor seizes than it’s the dealers fault.  I drove it home blinking most the way.  It wasn’t a fun ride but we made it home no problems.

The next day Saturday Niko was not acting right. We went to the mechanic shop and I figured Niko was feeling like I did.  Exhausted from the day before and needing a day of rest. Well Saturday is the holy Sabbath day for the Jewish culture. While waiting for the oil to be drained out of the car and the oil sensor to be checked Niko had a bloody stool. I knew one thing, he needed a vet, but who would be open on a Saturday and I had no money.

I couldn’t do anything until Monday and I called the bank to have them overnight a credit card.  I didn’t want more debt but something was wrong with Niko and it was getting worse. Sunday passed but Niko didn’t do anything but lay around, I had to keep him infront of the window he was soo hot, thank God it was cold that night.  I used the sleeping bag that was gifted to me at Standing Rock to withstand the cold wind blowing on Niko all night.  It might of just saved his life.

That Monday I finally get him to the nearest vet and he is running a temp of a 103.8 degrees Fahrenheit. This is hot, especially for my furry Niko who prefers Standing Rock temperatures. They don’t do any blood work, no stool sampes, no saliva samples, nothing.  They shoot him with needles and gives me one pill that is so big I would have a hard time swallowing it.

Next day I can’t get Niko to eat or drink, he is looking worse than the day before.  I had no choice, I drove him to the highest google rated vet in Flagstaff.  I knew it would be expensive but I had a credit card on the way and I ended up pulling out 400 dollars cash advance.  Not cheap interest one bit, 18%.  Niko is worth it though, plus I keep trusting that God is guiding me and will provide for me all I need.

The vet decides they want to keep Niko over night and I adamantly agreed. I couldn’t risk him over heating again.  It was a lonely night so I started a fire, and reheated my left over fry bread and pinto beans on the stove.  Actually a really good Hopi dish.  I modified it for my liking’s but I think their way is better.

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That next day I decided to get internet so I could continue working on my foundation and starting to reach out and network, maybe even find some funding. Problem is the doctors wanted to keep Niko until 430, the cable guy could only come between 1-5 that day, and I had an interview with the Hopi Tutskwa Permaculture Institute at 4pm.  I had to come up with something.

I rescheduled my interview, waited on the cable guy, and was able to pick Niko up by 5pm.  I even had time to apply to the Americorps VISA group to work on the Permaculture Institute.  I was excited to have Niko though and trying to give him his medicine has been some trouble.  He’ll take the pills when he is hungry, but he won’t eat if he is in pain.  So I have to get rid of his pain, and he’ll eat.  It’s complex but I found a method.

I just wait until he is really hungry or I dissolve the pill in water and squirt water in his mouth.  Yeah, he spits it out like a child.  Wagging his tongue all over the place. The good news is he did perk up today after I gave him the pain medication.  He was even out exploring a little and wanting to eat.  Lilian Hill was late to the meeting, but she had about 3 other meetings that day.

She has big plans and is growing quick.  Almost as if I am not even needed.  I should have went in humble and ready to be a servant.  Instead I reverted to old me and tried to sell my self like a sellsman.  I was honest, up front, and said a lot of truth.  Too much in fact.  If it had been a police investigation I would have been found guilty.  I don’t know.  Maybe it went well.

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Niko feeling better from the pain pills.

I was sad though when I showed up everyone was drinking or smoking, except Adel.  Not the singer.  She is my favorite person on the rez next to the kids.  She is always so much fun to talk to.  Plus I hope to show her I’m not full of poo, and I am actually going to do what I said I was going to do.  Build her a house.  I won’t leave until it is done.  I pray to God now that we get this house built.

I try to be a man of my word, I travel where God tells me to, when he tells me to.  Yet sometimes I get my self in over my head.  Sometimes I make mistakes. Sometimes I say the wrong thing.  However I have learned through all my years of exploring my self and the world, trust God.  Just pray, be grateful, and say thank you.  Ask and you shall receive.  It works every time.

Well I need a break, some food (I made vegan chili), and just relax to a good movie.  Thank you all for reading my first journal entry.  They might not all be this big, but you got one week in a brief moment.  It felt like a dream recorded in eternity for me.